A Liberating Decision in Favor of the Child

Hoping for clarification, she seeks out official counseling centers and makes an appointment for an abortion. At the last moment, she finds the SAMC on the Internet. Then her situation changes fundamentally. Mrs. N. contacts the SAMC emergency call center and is soon able to pour her heart out to a counselor on the phone.

“I can’t start all over again!”

The counselor listens carefully to the distraught woman for a long time. She hears how desperate this mother is and that she doesn’t see a way to cope with the situation of having another child, so that she thinks about having an abortion. With her new job, she is now in a position to contribute to the family’s financial security, or rather, “would be”, because that is precisely what Mrs. N. sees as being called into question by the pregnancy. However, she does not want to start planning her family life all over again.

The counselor develops suggestions for the desperate mother on how she can integrate this third child into her life. She also explains the specific help that SAMC can provide: In addition to providing advice and moral support, the family can also be helped with items for the baby, with the diaper service and, if necessary, financially too. Mrs. N. is a little more relaxed after the conversation and agrees to keep in touch with the counselor. She right away arranges the next appointment.

A different perspective on things

In the following conversations, the counselor goes into more detail about Mrs. N’s life situation. She learns that Mrs. N. fears having another child could lead to her husband’s breakdown, since he is under a lot of pressure. The counselor talks to the mother about measures that can be taken to counteract an overload and take care of the relationship. She also discusses the possible effects of an abortion on the relationship and that this could lead to separation.

Because Mrs. N. cries a lot, the counselor recommends that she listen carefully to her innermost feelings to find out what she really wants. She advises her to think about whether she is perhaps taking on too much for herself, including things that are not so essential. She also tells her that the majority of children are not planned and that she is far from alone with an unplanned child.

The exchange with the counselor helps Mrs. N. to acquire a perspective over time in which the challenge of the third child appears more positive.

The ray of hope

Finally, Mrs. N. is able to see how she can manage family life with a third child and tells the counselor that she has decided to keep her child. Her decision to have her child is liberating. She is no longer weighed down by worries and insecurity! Moreover, she can now see other things more clearly and is able to look to the future with confidence. She would like to continue talking to the counselor on a regular basis.

Even before the child is born, Mrs. N. receives financial and material support for her two children, which is very encouraging for the family. She can hardly believe, she says, that there is still such committed help today.

After the birth of her daughter, Mrs. N. calls the counselor. She thanks her sincerely for her words of encouragement throughout the pregnancy and especially for her support during her darkest phase. Realizing that she was not alone, knowing someone who would take the time to deal with her grief and worries, had been a powerful support in overcoming her uncertainty. She can now see that everything had a purpose.

SHMK will continue to stand by the family and help them financially and materially for as long as support is needed.